My Life In Progress

The 20s

2012-02-12T20:59:00.000-08:00

In less than an hour it will be my twentieth birthday. The not-very-funny-more-like-interesting thing is I honestly don't feel any different. Everything feels the same. Granted, my life has changed so drastically in the past three years that it's kind of hard to define what is "normal" because everything is changing. In the blink of an eye anything will be different. I find college is a part of life that will always keep one on their toes.

That being said, this is not what I expected my twenties to look like. When I was younger I imagined my life at this time to be like an episode of Friends - a not-so-glamorous-yet-fashionable-contemporary-fast-paced life in a city like New York where I drink coffee all the time and have adventures all over the city with a cute little apartment.

Literally what I imagined life to be like in the future.

However, life doesn't always work out the way you picture it. Maybe one day my life will be like an episode of Friends, but right now it's pretty damn awesome. As I begin this totally awesome and new period of my life I want to completely let things go. Will I have a job next summer? Not entirely sure...Am I going to Europe next summer? That's definitely for sure seeing how I've bought my non-refundable plane tickets and our apartments in Italy are amazing. Will Megan get into grad school? and if she does will it be at UVM? We don't know. That being said, will we be able to get an apartment and live together? I hope so...There are so many questions coming up that appear will never be answered but hopefully---and I truly believe it will, seeing how I'm always the optimist---everything will come together. It always does. So what will my twenties be like? I think it will be one giant play-by-ear. It has to be. As much as I feel the need to plan every minute of my life, I know I can't.

Right now, I'm going to enjoy my birthday as much as I can, things are extremely busy with the play and homework and responsibilities, and I will wait to see what happens next.

Check out the beautiful cast photo for The Beaux' Stratagem which opens this week Thursday 16th at UVM's Royal Tyler Theatre. Get your tickets now!

Peace out!

Rosie's Turn

2012-02-03T20:56:00.000-08:00

Thank you Ms. Midler for that splendid opening number. I thought this song would be appropriate because I'm taking this time to celebrate one of Megan and my bestest friends in the whole world. This afternoon we rushed to Barre, middle of VT to help Rosie finish moving out of her apartment she was being kicked out of by her so-called "Scumlord." She was planning on moving in a couple weeks to a trailer on the property of her cousin's farm she has begun working at. It's a beautiful farm, minus the manure but that's only because I'm a different breed of Vermonter, and her new place is awesome. Save for a finnicky shower head and some fixer-upper and cleaning, she'll be able to have that place looking great. I just wanted to take this time to tell Rosie how proud I am of her, both me and Megan. Here are some pictures from today at the farm:

And now, I leave you with pictures from the Champlain College Snowball last night at the Burlington Hilton. It's the one night when us college kids get to break out formal clothes, and because it's at Champlain and I don't know most of the people there, I feel the need to break loose and be absolutely crazy...not that that's much of a problem anywhere else. It just seems right at this kind of event where there are free meatballs, a giant cheese platter, and a chocolate fountain.

We found Jess!

Weren't we beautiful? And yes, that's a bowtie. Bowties are cool.

Peace out!

A Nature's Guide to Clubbing

2012-02-02T17:01:00.000-08:00

Are you an avid clubber? Do you enjoy raining yourself in glitter and sweat and grinding against total strangers to music with the bass so loud it feels like it pulled your heart out of your chest and shook it? Well if you do, then this blog post is not for you. For the rest of us, this guide to the jungle world that is the clubbing scene will help you identify a number of different species you will encounter on your journeys. Hopefully this guide will help you maneuver the laser lit rooms and avoid highly dangerous predators.

The Grinders
The first species you are likely to discover spends most of their clubbing time on the dance floor. The males and females form symbiotic physical relationships in which the female moves her butt in a circular motion around the male's crotch area to the beat of extremely loud rap music. This could also be considered a mating dance, however, anyone who comes in the near vicinity of The Grinders may find themselves victim of their grinding ways.

The Woo Girls and The Abercrombie Guys
Here's an example of The Woo Girls from one of my favorite T.V. show How I Met Your Mother:

The Woo Girls and the Abercrombie Guys are offshoot breeds of the drunkards. The Woo Girls are an extremely excitable bunch as evidenced by their exclamations and skanky clothing. The Abercrombie Guys are developed from the genus of frat boys as evidenced by their preppy yet dirty clothing and pitchers of beer in their hands. These species are generally harmless.

Gangsta Wannabes

In an actual city, this species would actually be gangsters. But in Burlington, VT, they're just weird. I think they forget where they're living.

Creepy Security Guys

This species is native to the clubbing scene. Mostly male, this species is signified by ultra tight T-shirts and muscles bigger than their stature actually allows. Mostly, this species walks around creepin' on other species in an attempt of intimidation. It doesn't work.

The Tongues

This species also forms physical symbiotic relationships, this time in connection with the oral cavity. They are distinguished by their lowly coordinated tongue movements and the glisten of saliva on their faces. This species is relatively harmless, yet shamelessly disgusting.

...and then there's us

When we walk in the club, all eyes on us.

Peace out!

Ryan Performs in Places: Mama Shirley

2012-01-27T06:37:00.000-08:00

Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you to a character I created when I was in Lyric's Hairspray this past fall. Her name is Mama Shirley. She is the sassy mama of the nicest kid Tammy, and she is very proud of her baby. This just goes to show that I'm willing to do anything for theatre. Anything.

So without further or do, some exclusive backstage footage from Hairspray:

Commitment.

Peace out!

'Twas the First Week of Classes

2012-01-20T15:29:00.000-08:00

'Twas the first week of classes,
And all through Burlington, Wills, and Spinner,
All the creatures were stirring,
Theatre kids, bros, and biddies too.

Outside was cold, but the theatre was warm,
And the classes were starting right on time.
There was essay writing, Sherlock Holmes, and T.A.ing,
Eurotheatre group bonding, Beowulf, and masks.

After class was all the fun, and dreams of weekends ahead...

There was 30 Rock and Brennan's food,

And Ashley hula-hooping for three hours while watching The Jersey Shore.

Of course we must not forget our British accents!

So... 'twas the first week of classes,

And we were all happy to be back.

Still waiting to get in groove,

But I know it'll happen soon.

So goodnight unto you all,

It's rehearsal time for me.

Peace out!

The Night I Was a Secret Agent

2012-01-09T17:02:00.000-08:00

This is how my life works:

I like making the minute details, the little things and situations, the finite moments, into exciting adventures and fun situations. It makes life a little more fun, and it keeps my imagination rolling. Maybe it's an exercise in acting, but either way I enjoy it.

Take tonight for instance: I wanted to go use the computer at the college in Lville after hours. I was on a quest for wi-fi, a miraculous thing that always alludes me when I'm home on break.

The American version of The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo was a surprisingly very good movie. America actually didn't ruin it, even if it had a couple of flaws. Rooney Mara deserves some kind of award for her performance as Lisbeth. Anyway, I totally felt like a secret agent. This badass.

The engine shudders into silence as I pull the key out of the ignition. The amber lights of the parking lot cast an eerie hue over the empty lot which ripples with snow, and my shadow as I slowly make my way towards the dark building is elongated in the evening light. I sling my bag over my shoulder as I pass into the entryway, the heels of my boots clicking on the pavement. Through the glass door I can see the faint fluorescent lighting in the distant hallway. I cautiously swing the door open and enter. The entry hall is silent---too silent---my breath echoes in reverberating gasps along the high ceiling. I gingerly walk across the glistening, newly waxed floor towards the end of the entry hall. Below the single fluorescent overhead light sits a staircase descending to the basement and across from that stands a grated door. In an instant I decide on the door---the basement would be too much effort---and pull on the grate. It slides open to reveal a small room, longer than it is wide, filled with black chairs and a small wooden table. I rush to a large chair in the corner of the room and pull out my computer just as all the fluorescent light switches off. I am plunged into darkness, only augmented by the faint glow of the moon as it passes through the row of windows behind me. Quickly, I flip my computer open and stare at the tiny icon in the bottom right hand corner as it turns from a red "X" to five white bars in a row. Target acquired.

Being a dork makes life so much more fun. Going back to Btown next week!

Peace out!

Looking Back, Moving Forward

2012-01-02T12:27:00.001-08:00

The snow is slowly falling outside the large windows, the sky a milky grey. The flakes drift through a new air brought on by a new year. A fresh start. The air is chilly, but familiar like an old friend. It's reminiscent of winters long gone: of sledding down hills, skiing across open countryside in the colorful dusk, snowball fights, and warm afternoons with hot chocolate. It's also the snowfall of new adventures and memories yet to come. 2011 was quite a year, definitely busy, and it was full of amazing memories and good adventures.

It was a very stormy winter in haunted Converse and Megan as an R.A. at Quarry (aka The Q). There were lots of treks across frozen tundra and cold walks.

I received one of the most epic birthday cakes of my life shaped like the Doctor's TARDIS. Thank you Kendra!

Twelfth Night was an awesome and fun show to be a part of!

I was a part of the Catamount Singers and took an amazing improvisational movement class which changed a lot of my views of performance and opened myself up to new possibilities.

Megan and I started a brand new adventure as a couple.

UPlayers had a very successful semester this spring with an awesome bake sale , cabaret, and scavenger hunt!

I got a new job at UVM this summer and got to live and explore in Burlington during a beautiful summer. And I saw things like waterless toilets. Weird.

Megan and I took a trip to Cape Cod to see Ashley after her epic semester in Ireland.

The Doctor, his Roman Goddess, and the Gypsy had an epic and classy Halloween weekend.

I had ovaries.

HAIRSPRAY! happened after all that hard work and a debilitating bout of bronchitis...

I also flexed a technical muscle in designing the lights for Toys this year. AND I was a teacher's assistant this semester, something that I loved doing and it confirmed my drive to be a theatre teacher. This summer I also started a "Ryan Performs in Places" segment on my blog which has been a lot of fun and a great outlet. I'm hoping to expand on it this year and possibly make a new blog for performances and writing. Hope to see you there!

I got my Dad a hoodie-footie for Christmas. Winning.

Iris had a good Christmas.

Finally, this Christmas and New Years was a lot of fun and full of Christmas cookies, family, and friends. The New Year concluded for Megan and I in Barre/Montpelier Vermont with one of our good friends Rosie. We went to the First Night dance party and then saw them release these beautiful paper, fire-lit lanterns into the night sky.

Happy New Year and a toast to new adventures.

Peace out!

Toys and Tea

2011-12-04T15:44:00.001-08:00

My mind seems blank, frozen over like the ground outside covered in a light crust of icy snow. It's completely burnt out, shriveled up, and blank...wiped clean from an entire semester's worth of work. My brain has been stuffed to capacity, left to revel in its exhaustion and information overload. I look forward to this holiday season to make sense of everything my brain has encompassed over the past semester, and apply all of it to my life. I wait by the window, staring at the sky hoping to see at least a single snowflake. I wait for the ground to be full of fresh powder, not this icy shell that makes the Earth seem dark and dreary. Once my mind recovers, it will snow again, and the lights will reflect color and radiance in beams of droplets and icy webs. It's almost that time of year.

And it began a couple of weekends ago with the opening of The Toys Take Over Christmas which I worked on as one of the lighting designers this year. It was a little sad to be seeing the show in a different angle, all I could think about was last year and all the fun I had performing in the show, but then I really got into seeing it in a visual way and had just as much fun with Toys. It was a fabulous weekend after the extremely stressful week that came before it with all the work that went in to designing those gosh darn lights. Who knew it was so stressful to turn a light on and make it work? Not I sir, not I. I have a much greater appreciation of the art of lighting. My parents took my niece Iris to the show and she absolutely loved it. Granted, she's one year old but she was laughing during the whole show which is a very good thing.

That weekend also came with the Hairspray reunion production party which was held at this club overlooking the lake. It was a pretty gorgeous venue, and it was amazing to see the whole gang again. I still can't believe almost four months out of this semester was spent on working on Hairspray. It was an amazing, rewarding, and yet tiring experience that was so worth it. I've been telling everyone that when I look back on this semester all I can see is bronchitis (Why did that have to happen on top of everything else??) and cans of hairspray. I loved working with those people, and I'm proud of all of the work I've put in during the course of this semester.

It was a weekend full of surprises and candycanes. I started the weekend with a packet of green tea in my pocket, thinking I'd use it at some point during the day, but I ended up being so busy that the packet of green tea stayed in my pocket all weekend. I found it late Sunday night when I emptied my pockets and pulled out this wrinkled green tea packet, saturated and dirty.

Now as the semester draws to an end, I feel like I am that tea bag, saturated with knowledge and experience and dirty from hours of labor. It's time for a break. It's time for a very merry Christmas.

We exchanged presents last night at the Casa de Meg Ashley Ryan last night:

Oh! And check out this amazing book I've discovered! It's called The Terrible Underpants. It's a pretty special book about a girl who has some nasty underpants that she doesn't want to wear because all the kids laugh at her when she hangs upside down on the monkey bars and they can see her underpants. Also she has a pet wombat. Duh...

Pick this up at your local library. I don't know why this isn't on Oprah's book club list yet...

Hope you have a very happy start to your holiday season!

Peace out!

Occupy My Life

2011-12-01T23:24:00.000-08:00

As we walked up the sidewalk, Megan and I hoped and prayed that the Marche (one of the very few late night dining options at UVM) would be open so there might be a chance at snagging some Ben and Jerry's for the night. Just as we came close, I could see through the windows that the lights in the Marche seemed pretty dark, and one of the door cages was down. The placed was closed. It had to be closed. But maybe there was a chance it was open. It was probably closed. But it has to be open. Ben and Jerry's depends on it! I ran up to the door in the harried hope that maybe...just maybe a miracle would happen and the door would magically be open just so I could get my hands on some creamy, sweet, and delicious Ben and Jerry's ice cream to relieve my stress. But when I pulled on the handle, the door wouldn't budge. I wept. I literally started crying as we walked back to the car, and then I thought to myself:

I'm crying right now because the Marche was closed so I couldn't get Ben and Jerry's. What is wrong with me?

Then I looked at my life, and looked at my choices, and realized that there was a lot wrong with me. Things have been pretty hectic in my camp with school and as one of the lighting designers with UVM's The Toys Take Over Christmas. It's been crazy, and there's been quite a lot of crying the past three days. The good news is the show is this weekend, so all the work we've been putting in will come to a head. Maybe soon I'll get a chance to finally occupy my life instead of being a bystander to all of the stress going on around me.

More good news: I got Ben and Jerry's tonight and the smell of frosty Christmas is in the air. Happy December!

My Christmas tradition: this song on repeat. 'Tis the season!

Peace out!

(It's) Hairspray!

2011-11-16T19:16:00.001-08:00

Good evening! I've been on a bit of a hiatus from the blogosphere lately because things have been extremely busy here in Burly World. This past weekend was the wonderfully amazing run of Lyric Theatre's Hairspray which I was so lucky to be a part of. I was extremely excited to finally be performing the show after months of rehearsals, and especially to be performing on the Flynn Theatre stage in downtown Btown, but now that show is over I'm really missing the cast and those same people I've seen everyday for the past four months. Like I said, though, we had an amazing run. Our audiences were fantastic and the show was awesome.

Here's a little story from opening night:

I had two major quick costume changes in the show. They were super fast so I had a dresser backstage to help me. She helped me get my pants on while changing my shoes, and this time I was especially nervous because it was opening night. Major pressure. I get the pants on and I'm just zipping up the fly as my dresser pulls out my hot pink neckerchief. I lift my head just as she pulls it from her pocket and BAM! her fist meets my eye. My dresser has successfully punched me in the eye.

I start swearing profusely (in my head of course just in case my microphone was on), and I clutched my eye.

"I'm so sorry!" my dresser pleads. Bless her heart. She didn't mean to.

"It's okay..." I say as the music for the song starts. I have to come on extremely soon.

And this is how I know I'm a true theatre kid. The first thing I thought of when I got punched was not "OH MY GOD MY EYE COULD BE SERIOUSLY INJURED!" but rather it was:

"OH MY GOD MY EYE IS WATERING! MY MAKEUP IS GOING TO RUN!"

I rushed to one of my cast mates and asked her if my makeup was running. Thankfully it wasn't, and the rest of the show went off without a hitch.

I decided that my momma name in the show was Shirley. She had a pretty well developed character even though she was only on stage for about two minutes.

Opening night concluded with an awesome opening night party with tons of food and drink and wonderful company. The weekend ended with strike which we all helped out with, and while it was long it eventually got to the point where I was dancing with a mop to "Time of My Life" from Dirty Dancing on the bare Flynn stage. Pretty successful.

Thanks to everyone who came out to see Hairspray! You made our show a tremendous success!

Peace out!

Ryan Performs in Places: Hairspray

2011-11-02T20:18:00.000-07:00

I was in a flash mob this weekend to promote Lyric Theatre's Hairspray which opens next weekend on November 10th. I am in the show, and the cast and crew is super talented. This is going to be an awesome production especially since we've been rehearsing since August.

Here's a promotional video done by local Vermont newspaper Seven Days:

Hope you can make it to the show! See you there.

Peace out!

November 1st Is Christmastime, Okay?

2011-11-01T20:38:00.000-07:00

Our Halloween looked a little something like this:

JESS!

The Doctor is partyin'

Too cute!

The Doctor and Velma are on the case...

And now it's November 1st which means it's Christmastime. Obviously.

Peace out!

Ryan Performs in Places: Witches and Leaves

2011-10-31T21:14:00.000-07:00

The forest smelt of spice and moisture settled on fallen leaves. The air filled with the murky dusk which settled like an ominous force upon the earth. All around were the noises of nature created a perfect harmony with the song which drifted on the evening wind. Drop, drop...a gentle rain cried upon the layer of mud and leaves, and over in the tallest tree sat a lone mourning dove whose throat gurgled in sadness. The birch trees showed their thick, white skins, radiating the reflected light from the cloudy atmosphere. In an act of surrender, the trees reached their branches to the sky. Along their bases drifted the misty lights of several fireflies in a vain attempt to illuminate the dusk.

From the darkness, the witches emerged to play. Their tiny feet pranced and trampled atop the matted forest floor, dancing between and around the trees, smacking the trunks with their calloused and withered hands. The slaps extended in the cold air to reverberate above the dark arms of the sky. It was a gathering, a nightly meeting consisting of numerous witches whose cries of joy and celebration filled the air. Their skin was several shades of green and brown, and they were covered in warts. Their grey hair flew up in fading locks around the brims of their pointed, crumpled black hats.

All at once, their singing grew into a chorus which shrieked over all the trees and the hillocks and the noises of the forest. Each yellowed smile of the witches joined into the jubilee, making the ruckus into a party. They danced closer to a dilapidated cabin which was overgrown in underbrush and forestation. It was very small, maybe no bigger than a closet or a doghouse, but it had a tiny window and a shingled roof which made it almost homey. The witches moved closer, sniffing the air and embracing the dusk. Each holding the hands of her nearest sister, the witches formed a circle around the cabin.

One of the hags stepped forward and grasped into the inner blackness of the cabin. With a grunt and wrench of her poor old arms, the witch pulled an enormous black cauldron from the depths of the cabin. Together, the witches brought the cauldron into a nearby clearing as the sky grew darker. One of the sisters bent down beneath the cauldron and exhaled upon the molding leaves upon the ground. Slowly the leaves dried and sparked so that the fire burned heavily to heat the cauldron.

As the firestarter stepped back in to the circle, another came forward placed her hands above the cauldron. A pool of green liquid began to form at the base of the cauldron, bubbling and boiling upwards until in was level with the brim. The witches cheered as the fireflies circled overhead, dancing and mingling the sparks from the fire so that they seemed one and the same. Bluish-green smoke rose of the hot liquid and curled to meet the tree branches. The witches were pleased with their work, and raised their arms in appreciation of the night, of life, and of creation. With a sweep of their arms, all of it disappeared. They vanished, and all that was left were the trees and the noises of the night.

Peace out!

Halloween Playlist

2011-10-26T21:33:00.000-07:00

This year I am totally into the Halloween season. This October seems so incredibly creepy especially with the rainstorms and constant black clouds we've had in the sky. I've been smelling pumpkin spice and drinking hot apple cider for the past month, and I can't wait to unveil my Halloween costume this weekend. I've made this awesome Halloween playlist this year to get me even more into the mood. Enjoy:

"Helter Skelter" from Across the Universe
"Spoooky Mormon Hell Dream" from The Book of Mormon
"Bloody Mary" by Lady Gaga
"Cannibal" by Ke$ha
"The Woman's Dead" from Curtains the Musical
"Slipping" from Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog
"Bad Romance" by Lady Gaga
"Monster" by Lady Gaga
The whole soundtrack from Rocky Horror Picture Show
"Thriller/Heads Will Roll" from Glee
"Battlefield" from Cirque du Soleil's Ka
"Be Prepared" from The Lion King
"Prologue (Little Shop of Horrors)" from Little Shop of Horrors
"Run Like, Um...Hell?" from Lost
"Monsters Are Such Interesting People" from Lost
"El Tango de Roxanne" from Moulin Rouge
"I'm Alive" from Next to Normal
The whole soundtrack from The Phantom of the Opera
"Rude Boy" by Rihanna
"The Dark I Know Well" from Spring Awakening
The whole soundtrack from Sweeney Todd
"E.T." by Katy Perry
"Thriller" by Michael Jackson
The whole soundtrack from Wicked
"Disturbia" by Rihanna

Hope you have a rocking start to your Halloween. Be spooky, be kooky, and have fun!

Peace out!

It Took Ovaries

2011-10-19T22:38:00.000-07:00

This is what I did this past weekend:

It was one of the most amazing performance experiences I've ever been a part of. On Friday, performance artist and co-playwright Bobbi Ausubel came to Royall Tyler Theatre to teach our Playing With Femininity class (seriously the best class ever---we just spend three hours reading plays about women and experimental theatre pieces while talking about sex, gender, and political issues) her physical technique of exploring character through improvisation, movement, and vocal work, not necessarily through sense memory and "The Method." She explained to us how emotions are held within our bodies, and the only way to act is to unleash these emotions through physical engagement. It was the most natural and invigorating way to act and explore character than I've ever learned. I loved it, and I want to use it in every acting work I do from now on.

Saturday night was the workshop performance. We performed the scenes from the play we had worked on and then Bobbi held a discussion of gender themes and what it means to live a bold lifestyle. She explained how change can only happen if we have the courage to stand up for injustice in our lives, in our society. The audience was amazing, and I had never felt such a connection with the audience before. It was all a shared experience just as gender discrimination and oppression is a shared experience every human being faces. Then in the nature of the play, Bobbi invited members of the audience to come up to the mic and share their stories, women for a time when they were bold, brazen, or courageous and for the men to talk about a woman in their life who had an ovaries moment. Some of the stories we got were funny, some were extremely emotional, some were inspirational, and some were a little awkward. I even got up and shared a story from high school. We created such a community in the theatre that night, and we had an amazing time celebrating women and a bold life.

"High School Gauntlet"

Bobbi Ausubel explaining the project.

I shared a story!

An emotional end to the scenes. "Rana"

For more information about the play That Takes Ovaries, Bobbi Ausubel, or how you can host an open mic, check out http://www.thattakesovaries.org/.

Peace out!

I Climbed This Jungle Gym Rope Spider Thing

2011-10-11T16:43:00.000-07:00

Peace out!

Cough Cough Dead

2011-09-30T21:32:00.000-07:00

There's a certain feeling that passes through and invades your body when you are about to get sick. It begins with a sort of cloudiness that fogs and darkens your vision like a thick storm unleashing a torrent of rain and lightning upon your brain. You can't focus, you can't think, and it seems like you could never get enough sleep. Along with this fogginess follows a nagging ache that creeps into every joint of your body and pries into your bones, making you shaky and weak, like every footfall is a great earthquake shaking your system. The pain lingers into your head as your sinuses slowly fill with mucous and snot, pressing against your brain and your face making each nerve under each tooth sting and every hair on your head to burn in agony. Beads of sweat pool on your blood-drained skin and soak into your clothes as your internal climate rises like a slow cooker for your internal organs.

All of these are hardcore warning signs of a cold, or a general sickness. Last week, I didn't feel ANY of these, but now this week I am stuck with this horrible cough, fevers, chills, antibiotics, and an annoying trip to the hospital where I'm asked question like:

"Are things okay at home?"

"Do you do drugs?"

...and, my favorite:

"Have you been around anyone with bedbugs recently?"

"YES! I'M LOUSY WITH BEDBUGS!! GIVE ME A BED!!!"

Someone tell me I'll get better soon...

Why is Ashley not looking at the camera? No one knows.

Rain

2011-09-23T22:27:00.000-07:00

The sidewalk glistens in a malaise of oil and rainwater,
But at this point it doesn't matter.
The beat of the music in my head crawls to my shoes which skip through the puddles, scraping water from the
Ground while I swing the umbrella from side to side.
The heavenly ointment unleashes in torrents from the clouds,
Baptizing me in absolute happiness.
Each droplet on my face is a splash of joy.
Each step I take is a thought of you.
As the rain embraces me, I smile a curious and wide grin,
And drink up the tears of the sky.

Sense Memory

2011-09-16T20:56:00.000-07:00

I love, love, LOVE the fall weather hitting Vermont right now. It's like a cold and clear breath of life that takes your heart in its grip and transports you to worlds of memories long forgotten yet still reminisced about. Upon each stinging breeze rides an image of crinkling leaves, the smell of apple cores and pumpkin spice, or the scratchy feel of a wool scarf on the skin. The chill which takes root in the feet and travels up each individual vertebrae to each follicle of hair holds a physical bond to day trips through an enchanted forest and afternoons spent on train tracks. The taste of dust and the feel of grit between teeth is a flash back to dirt roads and the hidden groves to which they lead.

Each memory dances with the senses in a waltz that began at birth. Each physical presence individually linked to an emotion draws me back yet pulls me forward at the same time. While I muse over the events and the feelings of the past, I am still pushed forward by a thirst for more. I long for more emotion, more feeling, more of the "breath life," for the essence that makes me utterly human. We long for the memories in life because that is what draws us forward, the longing and desire for future memories. We beg for new smells, feelings, and images that will give us retrospect to the events of our past and bring our lives in a circle.

Stepping from the front door, the fall's evening zephyr energizes my lungs and my body, propelling me forward into the sunset's lighted shadow. The leaves hanging stiffly from the trees' branches sway and crumple as they draw near to each other in anticipation of what is to come. Drawing my scarf closer to my throat, I walk along the broad sidewalk with heavy footfalls. The clouds above seem to sway lightly, taking in the moment below. I clutch my books to my chest and keep walking, observed and observing...

Hurricane Irene

2011-09-07T22:50:00.000-07:00

Life has been like a whirlwind since beginning the new school year, the days blowing by like clouds long past the horizon. It has been a major adjustment to switch from the comfort and blissful emptiness of summer UVM campus to the bustling, bro and biddie-filled campus in my Wills nest with Joe, one of the most peaceful locations on campus (when the door is closed). I've seemed to transcend a summer of leisure, occasional work, and sun to another world of constant work, schedules that have me running constantly, and colder weather. There is something deeply rewarding for me to be constantly busy, however. It is that amazing reminder that tells me that I'm doing something with my life, and that I'm definitely not letting myself go to waste. As I get more and more busy, and my planner gets so full it defies the boundaries of the page, and colder air permeates Burlington, I look forward to the promise of fall: of holidays, foliage, the smell of pumpkin spice, fresh apples, good and hearty food, and warmer clothes that allows every being to bundle up and get cozy with the ones they love.

A couple of Saturdays ago, my niece Iris turned one!

There was a full-on double rainbow glowing in the sky during one of our Hairspray rehearsals. It was honestly one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen in nature.

The start of school was delayed one day at UVM because of the wrath of Hurricane Irene. Megan, Ashley, and I holed ourselves up in the Spinner Place apartment while the storm raged outside. At first, the "storm" was quite anticlimactic. There was a piddle of rain, and not even the slightest rumble of thunder. Slowly, however, the clouds turned the sky completely black and the rain picked up. The Winooski river began to rise and raged its fierce power, boasting with the overflow of water. Meanwhile, the rest of Vermont was being swept away, the power of water rearing itself upon the land.

'Dis bitch.

As the storm battled against the earth outside, news reports rolled in about the devastation happening throughout Vermont. There were videos of bridges being swept away and pictures of towns in Southern Vermont being cut off from the rest of the state because of the flood waters. In the morning, the sun timidly rose to illuminate the aftermath. Burlington was beautiful, the rainwater glistening in the high sunshine, and the city was not highly devastated.

The Waterfront was beautiful.

In a way, the beginning of the school year has been just like Hurricane Irene. Everything has been so crazy and disorganized to start with, but hopefully now I've started to get a better control. It's another wild start to another insane school year.

Oh, and....

Peace out!

Dear Boys

2011-09-02T23:00:00.000-07:00

Please flush the toilet after you use it. I don't care if you're drunk, I don't care if you think you're wasting water, flush your disgusting bodily functions away, especially your puke which does not belong on the floor. Also, please work on your aim. I know some of you may be aspiring Jackson Pollocks out there, but the Wills first floor bathroom is not the place to practice. Please don't leave your moldy soap in the showers for it does not make me feel clean. Please don't leave your stereo blasting in the bathroom when I have to pee in the middle of the night. And for God's sake, please WASH YOUR HANDS AFTER YOU PEE. When you pee, you hopefully have to touch your penis (see above plea about aiming), and your penis is covered in sweat, bacteria, and urine spray. Said bacteria then covers your hands which then infect anything you touch. WASH YOUR FILTHY HANDS YOU DISGUSTING FRESHMEN BOYS.

If you obey these simple life rules, we can get along and have a nice, peaceful semester at Wills. Don't make this hard on yourself.

Love,
Ryan and Joe. Wills 108.

My Everything Hurts

2011-08-23T13:23:00.000-07:00

...and within a period of two days, I was packed up and moved out of my wonderful single in UHeights to the tiny double in Wills, but it's not all that bad. Somehow I found a way to take the lofted bed and fit Megan's loveseat under it. It created quite the batcave effect, which has been a pretty awesome addition to the room so far. I'm just waiting this week out now until Joe arrives on Sunday and school starts.

I'm so completely ready for school to start. Everything is in order, schedules have been made, books have been bought (In 14 different orders on Amazon as well as one from UVM.), and supplies have been organized. Megan and I just talked about how exciting it's going to be to pack up our backpacks Sunday night before the first day of school. I could not be more pumped and ready to go. I'm also super excited about being a TA and doing Hairspray rehearsals.

These all came today.

I actually had quite the stressful day right before getting completely moved out and going home for the weekend. It began when I went to the UVM Residential Life office, like I was told to do, and waited for ten minutes at the front desk until someone came out into the lobby to ask me if anyone had been helping me. Since no one was, the woman went back in and got me the key to my room. Once I was packed up, I moved a bunch (basically everything I owned) to Wills. When I went to lock the door, however, the key wouldn't turn in the lock. After swearing profusely, I ran to the front desk of my new dorm where the office manager was just about to take off for the day. She got me the right key all the while wondering why ResLife gave me the wrong one and where they got it. Needless to say that key worked.

Then, when I tried to turn my computer (Bertha) on to see if there was wireless in my new dorm, the screen fizzled out and went dark. I screamed and raced to the Computer Depot in the Davis Center with my baby clutched in my arms. There they hooked her up to another computer and determined that the problem was probably physical, so I had to send it in to the company. After talking with a thickly accented Indian customer service representative for an hour, we determined that there was definitely something wrong but my warranty had run out. It was cheaper to buy another computer.

Moment of silence for Bertha...........

Now enter Marcus, my new computer, who is very sleek and runs with Windows 7. I'm hoping Marcus will serve me well. This is my first blog post with him, and it's working quite well. Thank you, Costco! (Yes, we got my new computer at Costco.)

This weekend I also got the chance to go see Chase's directorial genius in Hairspray at the Haskell Opera House. I really missed that place from last summer, and I especially missed Lissy (who was amazing in the show), Chase (who needs a Broadway stage, stat), and Kat (who continues to astound me with her stage managing abilities). It was great to see everyone and take in an awesome show.

It was weird to watch the show and then come back to Burlington to start rehearsing it. But rehearse we did. Matt and I have been carpooling to rehearsals and totally rocking them. Hope you can all make it to the show! There will be links up soon over in the right sidebar. ------------------->

In the end: my back, my neck, my arms, my abs, and my legs are killing me. The dances are hard and I was totally drenched in sweat on Sunday but it's totally worth it. I missed working this hard for theatre so much. I felt so broken from lack of theatre (yet again) after having it the whole time last summer, and having this opportunity to perform on the big stage at the Flynn is absolutely amazing. For people like me, and Matt, and Chase, and Lissy, and Kat, anything is worth it for theatre.

And sweat is worth it.

Here are some more pictures from Megan and my drive yesterday to the Champlain Islands. It was a lot of fun and we found some Vermont nut free chocolates!

Another highlight from this weekend:

Peace out!

Just A Couple of Poems

2011-08-15T08:36:00.000-07:00

I wrote these for my Creative Writing class. I think I'm going to start writing more because these were a lot of fun as was this class. Enjoy!

They told me she was gone.

They told me you were gone,

But I didn’t believe them.

I knew that tomorrow I had to wake up next to you.

They showed me your coffin,

Asked me to say something in your honor,

But I couldn’t do it, not for them.

I tried to remember why they were burying an empty coffin,

And I looked for you, honestly I did.

They told me you were gone.

I told them they were lying.

We would meet for dinner that night

At your favorite restaurant.

I would walk you through the park,

And the streetlights would illuminate the trees

So that they seemed to embrace us

Just as I stopped to caress your cheek.

I knew I would have to lean in close

And you would breathe softly

While your heart picked up speed.

Our lips had to touch,

And I had to hang onto you

Because I knew that I could never lose you.

They stand like mountainous pillars rising into the sky,

Taller than anything I’ve seen before.

My mind wanders along their sides,

Mixing with the smog and clouds above.

The lights are mesmerizing,

Illuminating the night as though the Sun’s light had been born on Earth.

Here I find no need to be scared,

Here I feel the pull of home.

Strolling the streets is like taking a tour of the world.

Different people of all different lives share this air, and share this city.

Everything is available, every culture represented, everyone has a place,

And every dream is achievable.

My dreams are born here,

In the whiskey-scented nightclubs and the haze filled dance floors,

From the wombs of Sondheim’s characters and the heart of Hammerstein’s music.

My soul was manifested from the backdoor alleyways and the rooftops at night,

My heart forged on the stage floor and exiting out the backstage door.

Peace out!

Days Like These

2011-08-08T19:14:00.000-07:00

My alarm buzzed in its glaring tone at 6:30 a.m. Saturday morning. Weary, I rolled over and smacked my hand over the snooze. As the measly bits of early morning sunlight drifted through the room, I knew I had to get up if I was ever going to get everything done in this crazy, messed up day I had planned for myself.

And what a day it was...

My first task for the day was to take down some signs for a conference that had checked in the night before and use them to make my own signs for the hockey camp I had checking in this weekend. That went pretty well seeing how there was no one on the road that early in the morning, and it was hilarious to blast bad rap music while throwing signs out on the sidewalk. Then I had to grab door signs, candy, and cards to do room checks for the hockey camp. That got a little creepy seeing how the dorm complex was completely empty and every room in that place looks like a mental institution. I half expected Samara's ghost to be standing in the corner eyeballing me.

After an hour and a half of hanging signs and tossing maple candies into rooms, I ran over to Living/Learning to check the Puerto Ricans out that had been staying there since I started in May. For some reason, it took them a whole hour to drag their multitude of luggage over to the main desk so they could give me their keys. They were totally nice enough, but they propped the door to the main desk area open which set off this huge alarm. It blared throughout the entire hall, and I'm just running around being like, "GIVE ME YO KEYS! GIVE ME YO KEYS!" After about fifteen minutes, a member of the UVM Police stopped by for a little visit and I had to explain that there were a bunch of scientific Puerto Ricans checking out.

After that ordeal, I ran to make a quick lunch before working at the front desk until four. Then I had to run over with all of my check-in gear, including a stack of parking passes, to get ready to check in some of the hockey camp counselors. The check-in was supposed to happen outside, so I grabbed a small, round table for upstairs in the common room. Unfortunately, I didn't factor in my complete lack of strength as I attempted to hoist the puny, surprisingly heavy, table down the stairs. Then I rolled the monstrosity out the door and onto the lawn. I put everything, including the parking passes, down onto the table and went to go get a chair.

While I was gone, there must have been a monstrous gust of wind because the parking passes were blown everywhere. I spent ten minutes having a makeshift Easter egg hunt with the parking passes. I had just grabbed the last one when my client for the hockey camp drove into the parking lot.

Then I had to carry the table back upstairs...

At least Megan and I made the most fabulous nachos ever that night.

Peace out!

Ryan Performs in Places: Music Hall

2011-08-02T12:40:00.000-07:00

"Out There" from Disney's The Hunchback of Notre Dame by Alan Menken

A freewrite I wrote yesterday for my Creative Writing class:

The concept of “art” means something different to everyone. It’s the emotion of something that brings art to life. When you create something that has an emotional impact on somebody or something, that’s art. It can be anything: dance, music, theatre, painting, sculpting, it could even be something as simple as a good dinner. Or for some art can be a sports game or a nice day. It is a moment, a simple, clear, and beautiful moment that sparks a heavy emotion. To me, life itself can be a high form of art. It’s God’s art in a way, because it (of course) sparks heavy emotion in all of us. But then again, what if art didn’t mean that to someone else? would that change the very concept and illusion of what art was. What if that painting wasn’t art? What if that chicken dish isn’t as beautiful as a Rembrandt or as thrilling as a hockey game? Then that would make art perceptive. Art would have to based on the individual’s perception on the world. That concept in itself is a thing of beauty, and therefore art. Here we find a cycle, just as precise and complex as the water cycle, but entirely based on the spectrum of human emotion and spirit. Yes, I mentioned spirit. For where does art exist if not the very soul of human beings? Where can art come from? Sure, there has to be some sort of logical, scientific explanation for where art comes from, some random synapse in the brain that triggers an emotional impact or the urge to create, to make, to do, to perform, to sing, to dance, etc. But what if…what if we just took a moment to ponder the wonderfully amazing idea that art can exist elsewhere. It can reside in a glorious tomb, womb, some word of like that…of the soul. Inside of the individual, there is a well of emotion that comes pouring forth from us, and that is where art takes hold. That is where art can capture the imagination. We see it in small children…how their imaginations can create friends and whole worlds. I remember as I child I could imagine that my whole backyard was an enchanted forest, and here I was an explorer of that forest, transcending the mundane of reality and delving into the fantastical. What is wrong with that? why can’t art explore itself in the reaches of humanity that scientists fear to tread? That is how art becomes us. It is the very meat of humanity. It is the very breath of humanity. One of my favorite theatre troupes is the Bread and Puppet theatre residing in Glover, Vermont. Their motto is “Art is Cheap” and that it is the very food for the soul. And why not? If it is made from the soul and produced in the very orifices of the human race, then why should we not take as much in as we can, like food to a starving homeless person. It is vital. It is life force. It is beautiful, wonderful energy. That feeling you get when you hear an amazing soprano belt the high note, when you stare at a painting and see the vibrant and ever so slight brush strokes, when you taste a delectable meal and sigh with contentment.

Peace out!

Beauty

2011-07-21T08:18:00.000-07:00

I made the most amazing chocolate chip cookies last weekend. You know you want one.

Friday morning at work I made the most excellent Harry Potter themed weather board in anticipation of the FINAL MOVIE this past weekend.

Jake was supposed to come over this past weekend so we could all go see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 together but unfortunately Jake's car broke down. So, no Jake this weekend, but Megan and I still had a super awesome weekend which began with a lot of crying, cheering, and sobbing. Yes, I did all of those things while watching Harry Potter because to me, and to a whole generation of people, this movie really marks the end of an era. It marks the end of our childhoods, the last thing we grew up with.

I finished my re-read of the series on Friday just as I finished my desk shift. As I walked upstairs, I wiped tears from my eyes thinking about the adventures I had just been through, all the emotions I had felt, and all the lessons I had learned with Harry and his friends. And in one day's time, I knew that it was all going to end. It's crazy how something so simple can effect people, and how a single story can make connections between people.

My hands shook as the opening credits played and my heart stopped when I remembered Dobby's death. I laughed when Hermione transformed into the evil Bellatrix Lestrange (Helena Bonham Carter is a genius.), I cheered when Harry, Ron, and Hermione escaped Gringotts on the back of a dragon, I cried when Professor McGonagall unleashed her rage against the man who had murdered Dumbledore, I shook when Voldemort and the Death Eaters came to Hogwarts and began the battle, I screamed when Nagini murdered Snape and sobbed when Harry learned of Snape's true alliance, I weeped when Harry learned his true destiny and marched into the Forbidden Forest with his family by his side, I smiled when Harry survived the Avada Kedavra curse again only to come back to the castle and fight and win.

It was amazing, and a beautiful ending. To watch Harry send his own children off to Hogwarts was the most brilliant ending there could be. Thank you for these stories J.K. Rowling, you have brought so much joy to so many children with your writing.

On the way to Middlebury to dance in the street - Big Band style.

A U.F.O.! Of course a theatre would have this set up.

The coolest storefront ever.

One thought that's crossed my mind lately is the way actors work. I don't want to give my own tools away because their mine, but most teachers (Hagen, Stanislavski, Strasberg, Meisner, mostly The Method) talk about finding a substitution for the emotional moment of a scene from your own past. For example, if I had a scene where a character was arguing with someone who abandoned him, I would try to think of a moment in my own life when I ever felt abandoned or betrayed to substitute that real emotion into the character. (For me, sometimes this really isn't enough. I like the Practical Aesthetics method introduced by David Mamet which involves create a physical image of a character, imagining the "given circumstances," and then filling in with substitutions and emotions.) Megan brought up the strange dilemma to me when actors stop feeling in real life, and the only way they can express emotion becomes the stage in a character, they're not able to have emotion themselves. It's kind of that image of the "stoic actor" who is very pompous, speaks in monotone, but when they get on the stage they completely transform.

In a way, the stage becomes an actor's form of therapy. But is it crossing a line when an actor can no longer feel in their own lives? I think the answer is yes. Uta Hagen talks about how the actor needs to be a vessel for emotion, and in an interview with Jennifer Anniston that Megan and I were watching, she mentioned how she feels like the actor has a deep well of emotion that they just use. Being that "emotional sponge" is the way an actor becomes a character. Actors have to let emotion effect them. Always. That's how we get the tools we need to play characters. We need to embrace the brilliant happiness and deeply feel sadness and anger in order to convincingly use the entire spectrum of human emotion when creating the aesthetic of a character.

So that's why I cried, laughed, cheered, and sobbed through Harry Potter. Because that's what I felt, and I was filling my well.

Peace out!

Keepin' It Classy In Cape Cod

2011-07-08T12:33:00.000-07:00

As I walk down the glass hallway that leads to my room, rain and thunder pound away at the walls, and I realized that I left both of my windows open. I ran down the rest of the hallway, hurriedly unlocked my door, and dashed into my room to windows. I slipped and hydroplaned across the wet tiled floor and slammed into the windows, stubbing my toe and falling on my ass. This is no joke.

Btown just had a huge storm. While I was walking to the library it looked like the sky was in half with beautiful sunshine, and the other half was completely black. While I was coming back, it was like the storm was chasing me.

The banner I just made for my next group arriving to UVM.

This have been good since Megan and I came back to Vermont from our wonderful trip to Cape Cod, but I still wish we were there. It was a trip we've been trying to keep secret from the Internet because we were trying to surprise Ashley. We definitely succeeded in surprising her, and in rocking out the Cape. We did so much and we traveled all around, it would be really hard for me to go into detail for our entire trip. So here is a list of all the beautiful things we did. Hope you enjoy:

- We hiked around in Franconia Notch and the Basin

- We stopped in Plymouth, NH to surprise Eden then the three of us visited her awesome new apartment
- We stopped off in Cambridge on our way through Boston to find Harvard University, then got lost in Boston, and screamed as we drove through tunnels
- We named out GPS "Susan" and swore at her
- We sat in traffic, got flipped off, and got cut off
- We successfully surprised Ashley when she answered the front door and saw us standing there.

"WHAT THE FUCK! SINCE WHEN ARE YOU HERE!? FUCKING FUCK!"

- We got chewed by bugs
- We learned that Cape Cod belongs to Jesus

- Ashley gave us a tour of the Christmas Tree Shop
- We watched clouds descend onto the land
- We fought seagulls, hawks, and llamas
- We attempted to take a picture on the beach, but the sky was too bright, and Megan got sand in her eye

- We traveled to Provincetown and stopped by the National Seashore along the way

- We explored Ptown

- We went to an authentic Portuguese bakery and got fried dough and other yummy baked goods

- We made it to the end of the jetty

- We went clubbing at Pufferbellies in Hyannis twice, and met Ashley's friend John
- We met a group of Irish who were working on the Cape during the summer and were being discriminated against and being threatened to be kicked out of their apartment. But they were hilarious and had the best accents ever.
- We had a Ben and Jerry's buffet

- I broke my glasses, and then got them fixed in Falmouth
- We went to a toy store

- We went to a beautiful lighthouse on our way to Woods Hole

- We couldn't find parking in Woods Hole
- We couldn't go to Nantucket
- We went to the JFK Monument in Hyannis
- We went to a Zooquarium in Yarmouth and met a variety of different animals, especially the peacock we named Shannequa...because (s)he's sassy.

- We hiked two "Braille Trails" meant for blind people but I think if a blind person tried to walk either of these trails, they would die. Seriously dangerous.

- We frolicked in the woods and on playgrounds

- We met Vince and Laurie's (Ashley awesome parents') mannequin named Wayne

- We went to the beach and got totally sunburned.

- We attempted to ride this crazy paddleboat thing, but it was very hard to paddle in the ocean's currents and after about a million times flipping it over ad falling on rocks, we were done.

I paddled like Sawyer from LOST. Get it.

- We explored Main Street Hyannis including a creepy arcade with a sketchy bathroom where I thought I was going to be raped. Or murdered. Or both.
- We went to Nickerson State Park and tried to have a campfire. Emphasis on tried. Ashley and I did have a sword fight however, and we did eat Oreos with melted chocolate on them. Oh, and we hula-hooped, and we showed a group of kids how to use a piece of equipment on the playground.

- We went to the National Seashore Visitor's Center and checked out the surrounding area. I found a stage and danced on it.

- We went to the Drive-In and watched Cars 2 and Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides. But it was really more about the Drive-In experience. It's so much better than a cinema.

- We met Ashley's very shy cat named Bandit.

- We went to Scargo Tower in Dennis and saw a lake shaped like a fish

- We walked the beach

-We went to the Salem Witch Museum on the way home and discovered how prejudice in America causes modern day witch hunts. Way to go America. Again.

We had an amazing and wonderful trip. Thank you Laurie and Vince for letting us squat in your house for a week. Thank you Ashley for showing us Cape Cod. We loved it.

Peace out!

Sunset Salutation

2011-07-01T19:21:00.000-07:00

Peace out!

Ryan Performs in Places: Beach Improv

2011-06-29T16:55:00.000-07:00

Improv movement is about the moment. It's about letting go of all inhibitions and being free.

It starts with Meditation, then
Inspiration,
Creativity, and finally
The Moment.

I gave myself two modes with a transition point in between them as my guidelines.

Summer Days Driftin' Away

2011-06-20T08:38:00.000-07:00

Summer in Burlington is like one of those cheesy street scenes in a romantic comedy where the protagonist skips down the street and everyone in town is smiling and waving and going about their business. Of course, sometimes it can be a little sketchy, but so can all places. It's kind of like the beginning of Beauty and the Beast when Belle strolls down the street and everyone's just yelling "BONJOUR!" out of their windows. And there I am, skipping and dancing down the street listening to some random showtune on my iPod. (Literally, I probably am dancing. Look for me.) This summer seems to be going by so fast, I can't even believe we're almost at the end of June.

But there's also another place that's been on my mind. A place that's haunted my dreams and thoughts for the past week (probably longer). That place is New York. I can't stop thinking about it. Ever since the New York episode of Glee and between the Tony Awards and all the showtunes I listen to, I just can't stop thinking about that magical place where everything just seems right. Where I'm surrounded by people and theatres and lights. I need to find a stage to sing on. I need to find a place to perform again.

The past few nights I've had continuing dreams about New York. At first I dreamed that my parents, Megan, and I all went to New York for Christmas (something that I really want to happen in real life, mind you) and we saw the Rockettes and went skating in Central Park and saw so many shows on Broadway that my mind was spinning with the euphoria and adrenaline brought on by the theatre. The next night I dreamed that I was actually starring in a show (Book of Mormon to be exact, I think it was around the Tony Awards time.), and my whole family and Megan came to see the show. I belted so many notes and looked out at the audience, and they were all the first to stand for my ovation.

They were the most beautiful dreams I've ever experienced in my life. I need a stage.

Peace out!

Day Off

2011-06-09T13:59:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, I really had nothing to do for work so I basically took the day off. I walked downtown to the mall and to Boloco to get a Summer burrito (the kind with mango salsa that tastes so delicious!) and a Soy Berry Shake, then I walked down to the Waterfront boardwalk to eat it while having an argument with a seagull while another stalked me from behind to grab the mango I dropped under the bench. A very good day. Summer is here.

Peace out!

Ryan Performs in Places: Blackbird

2011-06-08T13:24:00.000-07:00

Hey ya'll! I'm starting a new series called Ryan Performs in Places. I'm basically going to go to places and perform. It could be singing, or dancing, or acting, or whatever I feel like and it could be anywhere...I'm like that kid who dances in Apple stores except not really. I will post my favorites on Youtube. Anyway, for my first performance, I sang The Beatles' "Blackbird" under the tree outside University Heights. Give me a little bit of credit, okay this is my first time posting a video like this. I was a tid bit nervous...Enjoy!

Peace out!

Contact Improvisation

2011-05-27T19:29:00.000-07:00

Here are a few pictures from the final session of my Movement and Improvisation class this semester:

We went down to Oak Ledge park in Burlington down by the waterfront to do some dancing and site improving. It was raining so hard and the lake was so flooded that the beach no longer existed and the water was sweeping up onto the walkway, dragging full trees out to open water and eroding away the trail. It was a lot of fun though and a great example of how beautiful the performing arts are in any medium when they persevere. That was basically how the end of the semester happened for me: perseverance. By the end of April, I was feeling like there was legitimately no more brain/will power that I could give. Somehow it all happened though including my Theatre History final which was a beast. Greece through the Renaissance. Bam. Overall, it wasn't that bad and the transition into this new job is going smoothly. Today was our last day of training and I'm definitely ready to begin the actual job and the actual summer. If only this rain/thunder/massive amounts of lightning would quick for a moment. But let's take a minute to see what my summer has been like so far.

Summer 2011 So Far:
1. I work in an office now. Which is a much better improvement from McDonald's, however it's a little weird for me. I'm just not totally emerged into it yet. Soon though. The cool thing is I get to work in all these different UVM buildings where I find things like this:

A composting toilet! It's basically a hole in the floor and when you push a button foam eats your poop.

2. Rain.

3. GAGA. Her new album is probably going to be my soundtrack during the whole summer. So much fun, I love it. It's so artful and full of character and life. It's the best to rock out to.

4. My new room in UHeights! One of the amazing perks of this job is that I get a free room in the swanky UHeights dorm on campus. I feel like I have my own apartment. It's fantastic, but I feel like I'm getting way too spoiled before next school year...

5. Beginning to have summer fun with Megan. The other night we went to the waterfront and started walking along the Burlington bike path as the sun set. It was beautiful, even though the water is still incredibly flooded and high and was eroding away the earth under the trees along the shore. It was part of the magic though.

6. Thinking about myself, and how I feel, and what I want to do with myself in the present and in the future. Ever since Voice and Speech I've thought about how I take care of myself as an artist and I've started really doing warm ups in the mornings and taking care of my voice and the rest of myself. I think I'm going to start doing Sun Salutations (yeah, yoga!?) and stretches out on the lawn this summer. Those are the things that make me feel good and happy, so why not do them? I've also been thinking about a performance piece I've been thinking about writing, and next semester, and grad school, and Hairspray, and why the hell am I not doing any performing the summer, etc.

This was part of a text I just sent to Megan:

"i hope i can really kick ass thru the rest of college and make something of myself in grad school u know? i still feel like im missing myself. im missing myself in parts that i only find when im truly in the moment performing (when im not being judged by teachers or peers) or when we're together doing something crazy :)"

Peace out!

Love Is...

2011-05-16T13:54:00.000-07:00

Hello! How's it going? It's been about two weeks since I've last posted because of end of the semester stuff going on and the beginnings of summer plans. Things have been going quite smoothly. Exams went by pretty fast, mostly because I only really had two, and my final grades came in and I'm extremely happy with how it all turned out. I just got back to Burlington on Saturday with Megan and now I'm chilling in my Converse tower practically all alone (it's very creepy, being in here with the ghost all by myself) watching TV shows all day. I'm preparing for the beginning of my summer job which starts training tomorrow. Looking out the window, it almost looks like all of UVM campus, all of Burlington for that matter, has been swallowed up by a giant cloud. The fog is so incredibly dense that it seems as though I could jump out the window and roll around in it. The mist combines with the rain to drop heavy moisture all over the sidewalks and cars in the parking lot.

I'm in one of those transitional moments completely symbolized by my limbo in Converse at the moment. Once this job starts and the summer days become beautiful once again, things will be a little more stable. There is something that has become quite stable though within the past month. I haven't brought it up on here yet because I just wanted some time, but also I was just a little nervous. I want to do a post wrapping some things up from the semester, but first I have to tell you, blogosphere (jeez, it's like I'm talking to the TARDIS) something really important:

Love is something that does not necessarily need to be searched for because it is usually right in front of you. Love is something that you may not think you need, but then when you totally have it you wonder how you ever lived without it. Love is someone who has always and will always be there for you in whatever state of trouble, happiness, or sadness you may have. Love is someone who makes you laugh constantly and who laughs at all of your ridiculous antics. Love is someone who is just as kooky as you are and who understands your inner (and constant) awkwardness. Love is someone who wants the same things out of life you do and who understands that you will do anything to make your (and their) dreams come true because dreams are completely possible. Love is someone who knows you completely and yet is still fascinated by something new about you everyday, while you are just as delved into their personality. Love kind of looks like this:

About a month and a half ago, Megan and I started dating. For reals. And it's been amazing ever since.

It's a whole new adventure and I'm so glad and excited that it happened. Now that I think back on it, I think its been a long time coming.

Peace out!

Pizza and Cookies

2011-05-02T17:48:00.000-07:00

This past week has been full of business, auditions, and happy moments. It began on Monday with Stop Kiss auditions at UVM. Those didn't quite work out according to plan, which was okay because I had a back up plan (kind of like Jennifer Lopez, except I don't want to be pregnant):

On Thursday night Alice, Matt, and I (we met some more RTT peeps there) traversed to Lyric Theatre's Hairspray auditions for next fall's production. Gina drove us in her car as our stage mom. She gave us encouragement and a little tough love. We were ready. Except it was one of the most nerve-racking experiences of my life. Just handing in the initial paperwork was terrifying. Don't even get me started on trying to pin my number on and then going over to take a picture. My legs were a little wobbily... But as I was getting my picture taken, guess who's standing off to the side saying my name? Annalise! From Shout It Out! She was there auditioning with Ty and Zach, a couple more folks from our cast. It had been such a long time since we'd seen each other, and it was great catching up. It still did not alleviate the shaking or my stomach turning around in circles. I took a page from Voice and Speech though and kept breathing. We did an improv workshop, then the crazy wild dance, and then we went in for the traditional audition. The whole introduce yourself, sing, and act. I think it helped that quoted Gaga as we went into the gym and put my paws up. Loosened me up.

Anyway, Friday passed and I hadn't heard anything about a call back while many of my friends had received one for that night. Tensions were high in my mind. Then came Saturday morning around 11:30 a.m. Click here and look at the "Council Members" list, second from the bottom. I'll give you a minute.

Seen it? Are you good?

I GOT A PART!!!!!!!!! I'M GOING TO BE IQ!!!!! I GET TO SING AND DANCE MY ASS OFF ON THE FLYNN STAGE THIS FALL!!!!!!!!

This is how excited I am.

I could not be more excited! This is such an amazing experience that I actually get to share with a lot of my friends from RTT who are also in the show. I got the call from an Unavailable number, and I knew immediately that this was it. I was shaking and crying while the stage manager was trying to give me the details about our first read through, and once the call was over I called my parents and my grandparents and jumped up an down and ran around The Q while Megan laughed and jumped around with me while families and students were trying to move out and gave me weird looks but I didn't care because I was so damn excited!!!

Anyway, as you can see I was excited. Just a little bit. When I say jumping around, I mean a lot of it. And rolling around. Really just a lot of moving and me screaming. Anywho, that same night was the End-of-the-Year Cabaret for UPlayers, and it went super well. We had a huge audience and our acts were totally awesome.

On Sunday I just want to mention that Megan and I went for a two hour hike in Centennial Woods because we can. We were pretty proud of ourselves, especially because we totally got lost (like, we ended up near the interstate going to Winooski, not quite sure how) but we found our way back. It was a perfect day.

It was a really perfect weekend actually, and now as we move into the last couple days of classes and exams, I will look back on this weekend with joy. Speaking of joy, check this out:

Did you know they made this? Pizza...and...cookies in the same box... This had become a staple in The Q kitchen mostly because it's pure college food but also because it's so damn delicious... I mean, PIZZA AND COOKIES! You can't go wrong.

Peace out!

Do I Look Drunk? and Other Silly Stories

2011-04-21T19:34:00.000-07:00

Hello hello! It's been quite awhile since I last posted, but there's been so much going on and so much left to do before the end of the semester. This whole week has been a blur on constant activity, running around, and ~~not~~ getting things done. Unfortunately, I'm sick on top of all that and with Stop Kiss auditions at UVM and Hairspray auditions with Lyric Theatre at the Flynn coming up in the next week (yes, I'm auditioning for two plays at once!), things are a little tense. I just wanted to give you an update on everything that's been going on this past week. Ready...set...go!

For all of you Vermonters out there, last Tuesday was Free Cone Day at Ben and Jerry's. This of course being the best holiday of the Spring, I was prepared for this. Ben and Jerry's is truly the only ice cream I really love, unfortunately it's terribly expensive so if I can get it for free, you bet I'm going to exploit that frozen sugary gold mine. Earlier in the day, the RTT gang headed to the Davis Center Ben and Jerry's for free cones after lunch (which we ate in line), then when Megan got out of work she came up to UVM and we got more cones.

The line was huge.

Our costume shop supervisor at RTT Alan (He's awesome. Just sayin'.) suggested we just take the truck.

Daffodils! Spring! Yay!

Then we headed downtown to raid the main Ben and Jerry's store! The line went all the way down the block to the Rite Aid. It was pretty intense.

Yay! More cones! Three total for the day, not a bad turn out for Free Cone Day.

Later that week was the opening of RTT's Spring Festival of Plays, or the senior's final projects, to put it frankly. I ran the light board (Yeah, that's right. I got technical. It was pretty crazy and I was insanely nervous. It was a great experience and it's awesome to have that on my resume, but it only confirmed that tech is not my thing. I didn't do so well on the taking orders and procedure bit. The show was awesome though.) for two performances, ushering for another, and working in the box office for the rest. It was a busy weekend, to say the least.

On Saturday I ran the light board for the matinee performance and ushered that night, so I went to grab dinner with Alice (Have I introduced Alice to the blog yet? One of my BFFs at RTT. SO MANY ACRONYMS!!!) who was also ushering. While we were waiting for the bus to go back to the theatre, this random drunk guy runs up to us.

"Okay, you three (there were three of us at the bus stop) as a collective whole, do I look or sound drunk!?"

Right from the get go this is not going to turn out well because the guy is quite obviously drunk.

"'Cuz I just got kicked out of Springfest (concert thing at UVM) because they thought I was pushin' people. I'm just a tall guy and when you stand like this (he proceeded to make some sort of weird pose with his hands behind his head and his crotch thrusted out) they think you're pushin' people when all you're tryin' to do is brace yourself!"

He then told us his ingenious plan to sneak back into Springfest even though the police specifically told him they were going to arrest him if he tried to come back. He was going to disguise himself. Of course I couldn't understand him a lot of the time because he was slurring his words. Fun times at UVM...

Needless to say, the one acts were fantastic and the Vermont Pub and Brewery party which Megan came to was a lot of fun. Even though I slowly got sick during that weekend, I managed to survive as did everyone involved. This cold that seeped into my throat, chest, voice, and sinuses was slowly wreaking havoc on my strength for the Catamount Singers concert which was approaching on Monday. That whole day I spent on vocal rest except for doing a skit in Theatre History and rehearsal for that night. It was brutal, but it did wonders to keep up my vocal agility for the concert. However, within the last hour before the concert was a stressful load of stress. I ran downtown to run some errands (including buying a dozen eggs for my lighting project on "Born This Way" which was amazing by the way), ate dinner, had a group meeting, realized that the black shirt I needed for the concert was left at The Q, ran to my dorm to grab all my other clothes, ran to The Q to get ready, and then Megan drove me to the concert. I was a hot mess that evening, but the concert went off without a hitch! It was a beautiful culmination to all the work we had been putting in all semester. Congrats Cat Singers!

Flashforward to Wednesday when the UPlayers threw their awesome 4/20 Bake Sale. It was projected to be successful because all those stoners need their munchies right? Some of our awesome slogans were:

"YOU GOT THE MUNCHIES WE GOT THE CURE!"

"BAKED GOODS FOR THE BAKED! (or not baked...whatever you prefer...)"

and my personal favorite:

"GET YOUR BAKE ON!"

It was a wildly successful bake sale. We even raffled off a giant cupcake filled with pudding and a strawberry cake even though they both went to our costuming professor...

Sam trying to stuff our crappy Student Government providing tent into its bag. Thanks for the crappy tent SGA!

As you can see, it's been a pretty busy week here in Burly World. Hopefully this cold will pass me by soon as I go home for Easter weekend. Everyone have a lovely Easter!

Peace out!

Lope Is My Friend: A Spanish Comedia

2011-04-12T18:49:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I (and all of the Theatre History students at RTT) turned in their gigantic final research papers for the semester. It was quite a feat finishing that beast, let me tell you. Mine came out to about 16 pages with 60 endnotes, 4086 words, and a four page bibliography. I could not be more proud of it, though. It's beautiful. It's my personal little (or not-so-little) work of art. And in the whole process of researching and writing this monstrosity, I think I made a friend.

That friend is Lope de Vega, a 16th Century Spanish Renaissance playwright and poet, and the subject of my paper. Lope was a child prodigy of the written word, and once claimed that he had written fifteen hundred plays in the span of his life. He had a dark past filled with women (LOTS of women, Lope was a player. He finally married an insane woman. Literally, insane.), exile, travels throughout Spain, death, a stint as an ordained priest, and an eventual decline in popularity, health, and well being. This totally did not stop him from being completely awesome, though. He had huge impacts in the world of literary drama and theatre. Lope was writing during the Spanish Golden Age of theatre when the private and public spheres were colliding, when the world of theatre was becoming professional with acting troupes (which even included women on the stage), when elaborate costumes were paid for and contributed by the community, and the building of permanent theatres. In 1609, Lope went before the Madrid Academy (the big cheese of the Spanish literary world) and introduced his Arte nuevo de hacer comedias en este tiempo in which he introduced a new form of the comedia (play). Lope's form would become the national drama of Spain because it combined the classical styles with modern Spanish concepts to create more accessibility with its audiences. Not only that, but Lope's dramas emphasized the theme of honor in the lowest classes on people, even peasants. He also created strong female roles which embodied honor and a woman's virtue. Lope was amazing, despite his personal failings.

My paper also explored the reasons why we as a Western culture do not know anything or study anything about Lope or all of Spanish culture/literature. What I found was a historical phenomenon known as the Black Legend, a prejudice that traces its roots all the way back to the Protestant/Catholic tensions between Spain and the rest of Europe, especially its worst enemy England. It's this prejudice that has lasted us for so long, and it's this same type of prejudice that prevents us from truly seeing modern cultures such as some Middle Eastern and Asian cultures because of stereotypes and prejudices we have placed on a whole group of people. It makes you see the world differently when you have it all laid out in front of you.

Lope stood for the little people. He wrote about the passion and honor of the peasant, even if he was a player... He made contributions to the intellect, form, and evolution to the Spanish drama. That's why Lope is my new friend. I got pretty emotional as I finished the final sentences Sunday night at 12:30 in the morning, and it wasn't just because I was exhausted. I felt like I was letting go of and losing a really great friend. But Lope will always be in my mind and in history. And by the way, bringing all of those books back to the library was an unbelievable feeling.

Yeah, that's right. A whole Price Chopper shopping bag.

One of my books on the Black Legend was called Tree of Hate, and there was a hilarious picture of the professor who wrote it. He looked terrifying and like he was constantly judging you. I forgot to take a picture of it, but here is me trying to replicate it for you:

This doesn't really do it justice, especially with my Reese's bowl behind me, but you get the idea. TREE OF HATE!!!

Thanks Lope for all the fun times!

Peace out!

Interesting Weekend

2011-04-05T18:55:00.000-07:00

This past weekend was interesting. It was very fun, just very different and full of activities. It all started on Saturday when Megan and I went to the HO Wheeler school in the North End of Burlington to help paint their gymnasium. It was a Champlain College campus-wide event that Megan as an RA made into a dorm event for The Q. It was a lot of fun and it felt amazing to help out. The principal there was extremely grateful we were all there to help make their school a better place. Megan and I helped out for about three hours cleaning up and washing paint brushes. Afterwards we drove around exploring Burlington (the North End is like a maze...) and went back to UVM to go to the Eat My Art Out dance showcase.

After a hilarious visit to Burger King (you can find some of the most interesting people at Burger King), Megan brought me to the Flynn Theatre to watch the Lucinda Childs show Dance for my dance Movement and Improvisation class.

The performance was once again...interesting...It was supposed to be an experiment in repetition, and trust me, that message was made loud and clear. The music was like a mix of Ke$ha and the New York Philharmonic, techno-orchestra I'd like to call it, and it was on repeat for each of the three dances. The choreography meanwhile was the same moves over and over and over again. It kind of put me in a hypnotic trance, but then the music would change key or the moves would change, and I would be immediately snapped out of the trance. It was weird. And they played a video of the same dance as it was filmed back in 1979 on the scrim in front of the live dancers so they moved in tandem. Extra weird...But I enjoy any occasion to go to the Flynn.

On Sunday Megan and I traversed to Royall Tyler Theatre to finish writing cues for my light lab project for my lighting class. I'm doing a light show to Lady Gaga's Born This Way. Yeah, I know. Awesome. When we got to the theatre, however, I was unnerved by the number of non-theatre people that had invaded the building. Apparently there was an international debate team competition going down in the theatre. Why? I don't know. Mess? Oh yeah.

The theatre kind of looked like a disaster zone. UPlayers had to find another meeting space because there was no space, and then I had to stick around to have a rehearsal for a class project. Meanwhile, all the senior directors for the Spring Play Festival were scrambling to find rehearsal space. Needless to say, the theatre kids of UVM were pissed. And it's not cool to get a theatre kid pissed. We kind of ban together, and that we did. We got free pizza and muffins. I'm not telling how...

Like I said, an interesting weekend.

Peace out!

Red Eye

2011-03-29T19:04:00.000-07:00

This was a very busy yet exciting past weekend. First off, Rosie came for a visit! Rosie is a very good friend of Megan and I so it was amazing to have her here in Burlington with us. We gave her epic tours of our campuses and the city of Burlington, and hopefully we transmitted our love of Burlington to her.

Chillin' in Space!

Then Saturday night was the kick off meeting for the UPlayers Red Eye Festival! We had about twenty participants this year which made five groups, one group doing a monologue. It was so much fun, and it was really weird being on the officer side of things this year compared to last year when I was just a member of the group. I wrote one of the plays. Mine was called The Adventures of Sassy Gay Friend. It was based off of the hilarious Sassy Gay Friend videos on Youtube only I based all the shows Sassy Gay Friend visits on the shows we did at UVM this past season, and Rebecca Black, and Frankenstein just for funsies. The whole show was awesome. Congratulations UPlayers! You can watch all of the plays at the UPlayers Tumblr page.

Here was our awesome group! Alice, Gina, Zak, and me!

Peace out!

Hair. Hair. Crazy Hair.

2011-03-22T14:51:00.000-07:00

Here are some spectacular updates or what's going on in my life:

1. I'M PRETTY STRESSED OUT but so isn't everybody around this time of the semester so I'll just skip over that one.

2. It's off! This happened awhile ago during Spring Break but I haven't gotten a chance to blog about it but all the hair I grew for Twelfth Night got cut off! Finally! I feel (and personally I think I look) much better.

Before

After

3. I got a new job! Yes folks, I got a new job for this upcoming summer. I am one of eight new Conference Assistants working at Conference and Event Services here at UVM. I get free housing during the summer and get to stay and work right here in Burlington! It's kind of like a dream come true. I'm so excited and the job is something that I'm really going to love doing, which is important. Megan is also going to be staying in Burlington during the summer working full time at Career Services at Champlain so you know there are going to be awesome adventures happening this summer. Stay tuned.

4. St. Patrick's Day and the UVM campus is normal. Everyone is going about their day, although everyone is looking a tad greener than usual. Then, on the steps of Royall Tyler Theatre, a figure emerges holding bagpipes with a group around him. It is Orion Lay-Sleeper, star of Twelfth Night, and yes...he stands on the front steps of the theatre and busts out some pipes.

It was awesome. (just sayin')

Okay, that is all for now.

Peace out!

There's A Squirrel In The Car!

2011-03-16T17:58:00.000-07:00

This story begins with my last post and the gigantic snow storm that terrorized Vermont last week. That morning when my dad woke me up at five in the morning to dig his car out but just ended up taking my mom's car was the beginning of another horror. My dad brought a little friend with him to work, a squirrel to be exact. I can't really disclose why the squirrel came with him to work (I'm sworn to secrecy), but it did.

And somehow the squirrel got loose in the car.

My dad said the squirrel was going to jump out of the car, saw the epic blizzard of nasty poop outside, and ran back into the car. My dad searched the car, but couldn't find the pesky critter. He opened all the doors, and hopefully let the squirrel out, right?

Fast-forward a day. I'm up at Lyndon State College where my mom works to use my computer because we're in the sticks of Lyndonville, and at my house there is no internet. You know my woes. Anyway, my mom gets off work, and I decide to stay and use the computer for another hour. One second later, my mom is standing in the doorway:

"RYAN, YOU NEED TO SKIP STAYING..."

"What?"

"YOU NEED TO SKIP STAYING AND HELP ME. GUESS WHO'S IN THE CAR?"

"Who?"

"THE SQUIRREL!!!!!!!"

"WHAT!?!?!?!"

"I GO OUT TO THE CAR AND IT'S SITTING ON THE DAMN CONSOLE SUNNING ITSELF!!!!!!!!!!!"

We rush out to the parking lot where my mom had opened all the doors and the trunk hatch in an attempt to let the squirrel out. We try to look around the car and inside to find the beast, but all we find is squirrel poop. My mom is SCREAMING this entire time as I start laughing my ASS off. I laugh so hard that tears start pouring from my eyes and I almost puke on the pavement. My favorite moment of the search was when we thought the squirrel had gotten inside the glove box, so I quickly threw it open, and my mom shrieked a high-pitched, blood-curdling scream.

There was nothing there.

In a last resort, we drive the car home (panicky mind you, that the squirrel is going to jump out at us at any minute, my mom is still screaming), leave it in the driveway, open everything up again, and let our cats outside to roam around and hopefully chase the varmint out of the car. About fifteen minutes later, I look outside and see both cats inside the car and a squirrel running away. It was gone.

All I could think to myself was, oh my God, we rode in the car with the squirrel...

Peace out!

Megan's Birthday Blizzard

2011-03-14T19:10:00.000-07:00

It rolled in like a drunken rager on a Saturday night in Burlington. It was The Great Blizzard of March 2011. Right at the beginning of spring break last week, a giant snowstorm engulfed Vermont, sending four feet of snow our way. It was also Megan's 21st birthday on Monday, the day the sky pooped a million pounds of snow. As Megan put it, Mother Nature totally stole her thunder.

The house was almost buried in snow.

I had to trudge through all of this to get to the deck to shovel it. I sunk into it up to my hip. Awesome.

My Monday began at five in the morning when my dad woke me up to help him dig his car out of the driveway so he could get to work. Apparently when my mom tried to go to work at four in the morning, her car got stuck at the end of the driveway so my dad went out and snow blowed the driveway out while my mom walked in the crap to work. After over half an hour, we still couldn't get his car out of the driveway so he dug out my mom's car and took that to work.

Yeah, this storm was that intense.

There were some silver linings to this giant storm, however. One of which was that Megan got a new (used) car for her birthday!

Look at that, she's totally a proud owner. Megan named her Space because it totally looks like a space car. Two doors with a secret third door in the back. And a sunroof. Score.

Also, Megan's mom and gram took us on a road trip to go shopping and to Foxwoods resort and casino. We had some fun on the car ride down:

I think what stunned me the most about Foxwoods was how it was in the middle of nowhere. It was especially interesting when the GPS told us to drive the car off the freeway in order to get there. We went to the casino and ate at Fudrucker's (a name which is very easy to turn into an induendo) and ate fantastic gelato (WAY better than normal ice cream). Then Megan and I had a fun swim in the pool. Then Megan's mom found a knife under the sofa bed in our room and we went to bed. Totally normal.

There was a shower cap in the room. Sexy!

In the morning we traveled to Mohegan Sun for an amazing, and the MOST EPIC BREAKFAST BUFFET ever. I had a cute little Asian lady make me an omlette.

"What you want on your omlette hun?!?!"

"I'll have bacon, tomato, and onion."

"Hokay! How much cheese you want!? Little or a lot?!?!"

It was a fun trip, and no one lost too much money, so I would say it was successful. Now we're back in Burlington, and Space was able to make the trip back. Time for some more excellent adventures in Btown and with the new member of the family, Space the space car! Happy Birthday Megan!

Peace out!

Eden, Kate, and Jill Went Up A Hill

2011-02-26T08:55:00.000-08:00

The tumultuous snowstorm that we had yesterday here in Burlington was a symbol---no, it was a metaphor---of the crazy, most intense day from Hell I had yesterday. It started with English class which went well despite almost falling asleep because it's at 8:30 in the morning and totally boring. Then at breakfast, my mom called me from Florida where my parents have been living the life going to Disney World, seeing my aunt and uncle, going to shows, and now going to see my grandparents. Completely jealous. Although I shouldn't really talk seeing how Megan and I already had our epic Florida adventure. Then I went to turn in this application for a job opportunity I'm pursuing here in Burlington for the summer. I'm not talking about it too much because I don't want to build too much hype just in case it doesn't work out. But if I do a fantastic interview, then there might be a beautiful chance. So anyway, this snowstorm was crazy. It was like a hurricane with snow, so much snow that you almost couldn't even open your eyes when you walked outside. I'm braving the crazy elements getting blown around and looking like a crazed snow beast when I finally find the building where I have to turn in the application. I'm trying to shake the snow off, but it's not really amounting to much so I just take the application out and walk into the office. A guy comes out of the office that totally looks like a college student. I thought maybe he was work study but then he introduced himself as the guy who I've been talking to this whole time about the job. It threw me way off. Not what I was expecting.

Then I went to work for more crazy times because these patrons can be CRAZY. Plus, I was trying to coordinate Chase, Lissy, and Avery to come to the show tonight and Lissy had to exchange her tickets, adding to the mass. And the snow made a ton of people come in late, but overall it worked out fine. After work I was rushing to fix my time card and put my hours in because I had to go to Redstone Campus for Catamount Singers, about twenty minutes away. I book it over there and walk into the classroom which was dark and noone was there, which was odd. I took my coat off, turned the lights on, and stood there. Then I remembered: Cat Singers was rehearsing in Ira Allen Chapel on Central Campus today because we're singing at an event. RUN! I sprinted through crazy snow, slush, and people to make it to Ira Allen Chapel on time. I actually made it seconds before we started rehearsing.......Thank you God.....

This was the event we sang for that same afternoon. Megan came to hear us sing, and the place was PACKED. The man, Cornel West, was really cool. He's my new homeboy. I liked what he had to say, but the whole time I was freaking out because he went WAY over time and my call for Twelfth Night was at 6. Another RUN moment happened after this show. It was amazing that I made it on time to everything yesterday.

This whole week has been sort of crazy, but totally fun. Eden came and stayed at The Q with Megan and I this past weekend. I missed her so much! She came to the show and we watched horror movies until late into the night and had an epic slumber party. Just like high school times. Very fun. That girl just brings sunshine wherever she goes. After she left, Megan and I just felt so sad because she wasn't with us anymore. But I am so proud of her because she is doing so well and creating a beautiful life for herself. Love you darling!

Jill and Kate, my beautiful friends from Lyndon, came to Btown Tuesday afternoon to stay with me until Friday. Kate is probably going to be coming to UVM next year (a fact I am very excited about) so they came to check out Burlington and UVM. Unfortunately, UVM parking hated Jill's car and the size of my closet room made sleeping arrangements a little difficult but somehow we figured it out. They came to show along with Joe and Kat, which made for an excellent night. I was so happy they were there staying with me. We all cried when they had to leave, and I miss them.

Now it's closing weekend for Twelfth Night, and things on that front are winding down. It has been an awesome run, and I'm sad for it to be over but I'm also ready to experience this semester without Twelfth Night as well. The added time to my schedule is going to be amazing. Maybe I can actually take my time with homework.

Closing weekend.

Peace out!

My Birthday

2011-02-17T14:04:00.000-08:00

In case any of you didn't know, and I honestly can't find anyway you wouldn't know I mean, jeez...it was my 19th birthday this past weekend, and it was a pretty amazing birthday weekend at that. My birthday this year really revealed the love that exists in my life and really just how beautiful life can be. It all started last week when Megan came and spent a couple nights with me at Converse which hasn't happened in a long time. Of course, this happened while Twelfth Night was finishing its last rehearsals before tech so it got a little crazy so by Friday night, I was pooped and I got even more pooped after a long rehearsal that night. But it was a good kind of pooped, obviously.

Cast, crew, and orchestra photo!

Saturday made up for all the poopedness. After sleeping in which was wonderful, and much needed, Megan and I took the bus to Williston to go watch No Strings Attached which was actually a really good movie.

It's really weird because Natalie Portman is in like a million movies recently. It's like her agent was on crack when they scheduled her for all of these movies...

Anyway, back on topic: so we had a really good time watching the movie when we decided we were so hungry we could eat like a baby dinosaur so we went to Chili's for lunch! It was soooooooooooo good! Perfect birthday meal seriously. So then after going to Toy's R Us (see post It's the Little Things) and after going to PetSmart to look at puppies, kittens, birds, and fish, we walked through a snow tornado, took the bus, and went back to the Q to do homework.

As if that wasn't enough, the next day was tech day for Twelfth Night so that means a 9-9 day. I got to the theater a little earlier than everyone else so I was just chilling in the green room when all of a sudden everyone comes in and starts singing Happy Birthday to me. It was kind of amazing. Then at our lunch break, I'm just sitting there eating pizza when all of a sudden my friend Kendra brings over this cake and announces my birthday. I freak out 1) because I love being surprised with cakes and 2) the cake was in the shape of Doctor Who's TARDIS. If you don't know what that is, that's okay. A lot of people don't, but it made my day.

Then everyone said happy birthday to me and we finished the tech. It was such a fantastic day. How I described it at the time was that I was overwhelmed with love. I think that's the perfect way to describe this birthday. Thank you to everyone for making it so special and thanks to Megan for my amazing birthday presents and a beautiful day. I love you!

And now, tonight is the night! Opening night! Hope you all come out to see the show! Here's my hair:

Opening Night

Peace out!

It's The Little Things

2011-02-12T16:14:00.000-08:00

and then we went on a little trip to Toys 'R Us...

It's Barbie's black friends!

Slutty Barbie waits for Ken to come home...

Megan is a Stormtrooper.

Beyblades! Jake I used to love to play with these!

These stuffed animals sang different pitches when you pressed them. and their mouths moved. Weird.

I wanna drive this around!

The Biebs loves to be played with by small children...

It's the small things that entertain us. Happy Birthday to me! (Tomorrow)

Peace out!

Things Are Getting Hairy!

2011-02-08T06:11:00.000-08:00

Taken on Sunday, one week and four days from opening night:

So, yeah. My hair's getting pretty long.

I hope everyone survived the crazy thundersnow we had last night. It was crazy! Whooda thunk that there could actually be thunder and lightning during the winter? It was like end of the world weather...and it's only 2011! Jeez, at least wait until the scheduled time world! Anyway, I had a pretty fantastic weekend. After a very LONG rehearsal, my parents came over to go out for my birthday (which really isn't until next Sunday, but that's tech day for Twelfth Night, and why not celebrate all month? I'm worth it!) They brought me the iTouch my grandparents got for me for my birthday. I love that thing! I can do everything with it. I'm starting to wonder how I survived without the iTouch. The only left to do to christen it is to give it a name...

After the thundersnow, UVM campus turned into an artic wonderland with snowbanks in the paths that you have to climb over, giant icicles, and ice everywhere.

It was absolutely beautiful, and Megan and I decided to enjoy it. Basically this entailed randomly jumping into snowbanks, and "Bracing for Impact." Inside joke...sorry...

Of course, Sunday was Superbowl day, but it was also the day of the re-premiere of Glee! So, Megan and I decided to throw a not-so-Superbowl party that was basically us waiting for the Superbowl to be over so we could watch Glee. We decided to go all out and make a fantastic dinner: Tacos!

We even made our own salsa with tomatoes which we chopped and pureed with peppers and garlic. It was really good even though it was missing something. That's okay, we'll work on it.

The meat smelled SO GOOD!

Look at that! How could you not pass that up?

That was my weekend. How was yours? What did you do for the Superbowl? Hope you all have some fun in the snow!

A giant sat down here...

Peace out!

Groundhog Day

2011-02-02T13:31:00.000-08:00

Happy Groundhog Day! or as I like to call it CRAZY BLIZZARD DAY! Seriously this storm is like, "RAWR EASTERN SEA BOARD YOU'RE MINE!" Personally I think it's a little selfish of Mother Nature considering how school still wasn't cancelled today on account of wild snow/ice conditions. Theatre History was cancelled though, and the box office was closed today which provided a pretty good break during the day. The view out my window was awesome.

It's like all of Burlington is a cloud, and I just sit alone in my castle surveying this cloud. Pretty cool, huh? However, this morning when Punxsutawney Phil crawled his cute little butt out of his hole, he did not see his shadow. You know what that means? Early spring coming our way!

He's pretty darn cute, right?

I decided to announce the fact that our friend Phil decided on an early spring in the theater green room. I was just being funny and making conversation when some random person replied,

"That's just stupid bullshit."

I was like, "EXCUSE ME!? WHAT YOU SAYIN'?" I was not impressed. Where's your spirit? Did you lose all sense of whimsy? I was about ready to defend my groundhog standpoint. This was me:

Click on the picture and you'll see!

...but the guy left before I could defend my magical groundhog. Seriously, where have people's senses of imagination, fun, and whimsy gone? What's wrong with believing in something or just having fun? Sure, I know that PP (my nickname for good ole Phil) can't really predict the weather with his shadow, but I'm not going to walk around being bitter about the fact. Sometimes I seriously think science is a bad thing. Humans were not meant to have all the "answers." I mean, I could say gravity is stupid bullshit if I wanted to, it's just a theory. So let me believe in my groundhog, and don't rain on other people's parade when their beliefs conflict with your own perfect world.

Thank you.

Peace out!

Hair Update

2011-01-28T20:10:00.000-08:00

I've been told that for my role in Twelfth Night, I must continue to grow my hair for the show. I haven't cut my hair since around Thanksgiving. For those of you who don't know, when my hair grows long, it gets big and CRAZY...so I decided to keep you updated on the status of my wild and cooky hair. Enjoy.
2 weeks and 6 days until opening night:

Peace out!

Singing Again

2011-01-27T14:07:00.000-08:00

I did it! After three sessions of auditions, I made it into the Catamount Singers here at UVM! I don't think I really have to explain to you how excited I am, but I will:
I AM SO EXCITED TO BE SINGING AGAIN!

Look out world, because I'm coming back!

Peace out!

The Coke Story

2011-01-22T18:13:00.000-08:00

Quoting instant message convo with Megan from a couple nights ago:

Ryan Howland says
so my brother gave me a six pack of classic glass coke bottles (there was coke in them to drink obvs but they were in glass so it was toes cool)

i brought them with me to school. last night i went to open one

...

Megan says
uh huh

Ryan Howland says
and i realized they weren't screw tops, but like the old fashioned ones where you need a bottle opener/use the thingy on the machine dispenser like the old time 80s ones

so i took a spoon...

and tried to pry the cap off

...yup

so I'm prying and prying and all of a sudden the cap explodes off the bottle, hits the ceiling and bounces off the deks

*desk

and soda spills into my lap

Megan says
lmfao oh damn

Ryan Howland says
yeah so that's the coke story

Peace out!

Service With A Smile

2011-01-16T21:20:00.000-08:00

Back in Burlington! Yep, I returned to the big, not-so-bad Burly World on Friday where I was introduced to Megan's new dorm: The Q.

It's off the hook! She basically has her own apartment with a full kitchen, a HUGE living room, her own bedroom, and her own personal bathroom with a bathtub. The only issue is that it's quite far away considering it's an "off-campus dorm," but we have found ways to remedy that. There are secret roads and bike paths that totally take you there, and there's always the Champlain off-campus shuttle. It's not a big deal. It does mean that I can't really traverse to The Q during the week because of schedules and Megan can't really hike it to Converse either because of RA duties. But it's still cool. Her room is awesome. In case I haven't made myself perfectly clear...her room is awesome. The best part about the whole deal is that it's free because she's an RA. Well, it's not completely free I mean she does actually have to work as an RA but you get the point.

Anyway, before arriving at The Q, my mom and I stopped in for some lunch at Olive Garden, one of the best restaurants ever. We got a waitress that was pretty amazing. She kept saying "PERFECT!" all the time about everything we said.

"Soup, salad, and breadsticks??? PERFECT!"

It was in one of those rad, pothead, skateboard-type voices and it wasn't just "PERFECT," there were definitely a couple of "right ons!" thrown in there. Also, my mom asked for the dressing to be put on the side of our salad (she doesn't like a lot of dressing, crazy I know) so when this wonderfully ignorant, yet very entertaining waitress returned with our salad, she said:

"I like totally kept forgetting you didn't want dressing so a accidentally made like six salads with dressing on them. I kept looking down and was like, 'Crap!'"

I tried to get my mom to write "PERFECT!" on the receipt but she wouldn't do it.

I came back to Burlington at such an odd time because we started rehearsals for UVM's Twelfth Night this weekend. So far they're going very well. It's going to be a fantastic show, and I'm not saying that just because I'm in it. I'm kind of nervous because this is my first Shakespeare, but I think with this cast and the guidance we're receiving along with the hard work we're willing to put in, it will all work out. I'm definitely going to learn a lot. Plus, I'm already starting to gain an appreciation for Shakespeare. That's definitely an accomplishment. Shakespeare just really hasn't been something I've connected to or necessarily liked. I think it's because I just haven't understood it before. Now as I've grown in theatrical experience, I can actually understand what's happening and how these characters feel, especially what they want. Anyway, I've been living here at The Q all weekend getting to know Megan's co RA Nicole, watching Megan bust butt as an RA, making wicked awesome food in the wicked awesome kitchen, and watching the Miss America pageant.

Then, this morning (finally) UVM opened the dorms at noon and I was able to move in. I had rehearsal at 1:15. Problem. My parents and Megan's mom and gram arrived at 11 and we all went out to eat. This wouldn't have been an issue to our timetable if the waiter at Friendly's wasn't so slow. We legit waited three hours for our food. Okay, maybe not three hours but a long time. I managed to check in and get my card reactivated around 12:45. Let the Japanese game show that was moving me back into Converse begin. It was like a soul train line of my mom, me, Megan, her mom, and my dad parading up the stairs with my crap. Megan raced in to retrieve all the stuff she had in there and I threw it all in, then booked it to rehearsal.

Just in time.

Peace out!

Fever Dream

2011-01-06T07:53:00.000-08:00

About a month ago I learned about auditions for a new reality TV show on the Oxygen network called The Glee Project.

I found it online and freaked. Basically, the show is a competition like American Idol for young singers/dancers/actors 18 and up competing for a multi-episode guest spot in season 3 of Glee. Yeah, totally sweet and an awesome opportunity. Here's the thing: the casting calls are in Chicago and Dallas. And plane tickets are totally crap. When I first found out about it, I immediately called my parents (after just talking with them on the phone not five minutes before) and said:

"So, what's the chance of us going to Dallas, Texas over break?"

Needless to say, that tack didn't quite take. Then we had a talk. The filming of the show is right in the middle of this next semester. So even if I did get in, it would mean taking a semester off. I tried to explain how it would be SO worth it, and how auditioning never hurts, but it wasn't working.

The Chicago calls were in December and now the Dallas ones are this weekend. I'm sad because "Don't Rain on my Parade" and "And I Am Telling You" are both on the song list and I know I can belt out some crazy covers of both, but I do see the effect it would have on school and my financial woes. I guess this is just on fever dream that's going to have to stay with me.

Peace out!

Cross Country Skiing

2011-01-03T08:20:00.000-08:00

I've been a bad blogger. And I promise, I'm trying to reform. I'll work extra hard to make sure not another two weeks goes by without a blog post. It's very hard when you don't have Internet at your house and you have to hole yourself in the student lounge at Lyndon State College frantically trying to catch up on everything that would have been done had I been at school with regular Internet. Parents *cough cough*. Anywho, enough with that...I hope everyone had a joyous and merry Christmas and a very very happy New Year. We had a very small Christmas but it was nice. On Christmas Eve my parents, Megan, and I went to church at my old childhood church and sang carols. My parents and I had a very relaxing Christmas day and on New Years I got to see my brother, his wife, and Iris again. Then Megan and I went on a night drive to Rosie's house (another one of our friends who lives in Barre, we love her to pieces) and to the First Night in Montpelier which we had no idea existed. It was basically a giant block party and they lit giant crate paper Japanese lanterns which flew into the sky. There had to have been hundreds of them. It was beautiful. We tried looking for Erin while we were there, but to no avail. Oh yeah, then Megan and I went to the Cumby's (the same one we almost got robbed in) and made friends with these two po-po's (police officers for those of you who don't know street lingo homie) who were getting coffee. Then we got this hypershock coffee with 50% more caffeine in it. Intense.

Unfortunetely, this break has been somewhat stressful. I've been thinking about a ton of future and money and plays and such... Because I didn't get any hours at McDick's (I'm not going to spit out the whole corporate name for you again), which I know is because of this crappy economy but still...I've started thinking about finding a new job. Meanwhile, I also auditioned (and got called back for) Hairspray though Chase's company Act Three Theatricals being performed at the Haskell Opera House this summer. I want to be in the show so bad, but if I need a new job with wonky hours (I'm looking into working at LSC because it's so close by and there may be awesome job opportunities), then I can't do the show. It's all very dramatic and stressful (but hey, that's my life, right?).

Because of everything being so stressful, I've been thinking about those times during the winter when all I felt was calm and peace. It goes back to my freshman year of high school when I was on LI's cross country ski team. Yes, I know what you're going to say, "OMG, Ryan did sports!?" Yeah, it's crazy. I did it for a PE credit, okay? High school sucks. Anyway, sometimes we would go to Burke Mountain, or my personal favorite, to the Wildflower Inn on the Kingdom Trails to practice and ski. Of course I always fell behind everyone because I have zero strength and physical endurance so I was always alone on the course. I would be so slow that it would get start to get dark and I would still be making my way along the trail trying to reach the end. And when I would get lost, that would be even better. The thing is, it was magical. I would be so cold that after awhile I wouldn't even feel the pain in my legs and thighs or the sting of snow as it slapped my face. Dusk would settle and the sun would cast a massive glow over the entire mountain. The snow looked like cream as a glided over it. The trees were tall and imposing, and yet they glistened with the ice that trickled from their branches. It was a moment of peace. I didn't even care that I was always the last one to the bus and I came in last place for every race I competed in. I was enjoying the beauty of where I was.

Peace out!

From the Library to Home

2010-12-23T07:51:00.000-08:00

I returned home from the hardest and most stressful semester yet last week. Remember when I said I loved the library? The smell of the books, the thrill of the hunt trying to find the right book with the right information...well that's still all true. I still love the excitement that comes from finding that book on the shelf, it's just...when last Wednesday rolled around...I was ready to get the hell out of there. While finding reference books to take pictures of drawings and old magazine photos of 30s fashion was fun, I was done with the whole intellectual part of school. Then I spent a total of 13 hours finishing my costuming project, which was again was fun especially while belting out showtunes in the costume shop, I was still ready to go home. I was ready for Christmas. Unfortunetely (but also fortunetely), we had to leave 308 behind and close it's doors for the last time because we all moved out. Ashley is on her way to Ireland to study abroad, and Megan got accepted to be an RA next semester. She's going to be moving into Champlain's Quarry Hill ("The Q" as it will lovingly be called) January 3rd. So this is goodbye to our precious 308 where we have had amazing memories and fantastic times...

The first thing that had to happen when I got home was to decorate. My mom and I spent all last Friday decorating the house. We got the tree inside (a week before Christmas, yikes!) and while it's kind of a Charlie Brown tree, it's still pretty with the white lights and old ornaments. On Saturday I went outside and put lights all over the front of the house. If you ask me, I think we won for best house decoration, if a little late. Then came the baking. We baked peanut butter blossoms with chocolate on top and sugar cookies with frosting and sprinkles with M&Ms and gumdrops! If you can't tell I got a little excited about the cookies.

One of my family's biggest Christmas traditions is that we always watch the movie National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation starring Chevy Chase. I think it's my mom's favorite movie. Anyway, every year we try to rent it somewhere because we don't actually own it. So, we tried at the Lyndon State College library (my mom works up there), but alas there was no movie. My mom was pretty dissappointed. So my parents went to one of the antique stores in Lville and found it on VHS. It's pretty weird that VHS tapes are antiques now...just saying. We got to watch the movie. It's a hilarious movie and I think it'll always be a family tradition.

Something else that' happened so far over this break is that, while my boss forgot to schedule me for hours this week (don't get me started), I have free time (at least for this week). So, Eden made a special trip up from Plymouth to see her family and Megan and I. It was so awesome to see her. I miss that girl!

Anyway, it's shaping up to be a beautiful Christmas season. Break out the eggnog, Santa hats, music, and mistletoe and let's rock this Christmas!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Toys 2010

2010-12-12T19:56:00.000-08:00

Last weekend, my Christmas season truly began. It was Toys weekend. Six weeks of rehearsal, a straight back, tight knees (I was one of the toy soldiers), dancing, singing, and line rehearsals led up to last weekend. Six shows. One weekend. Go.

Each day started at 7:30 for breakfast in the theater, then makeup, then warm-up, then costume. Then the cycle started all over again two more times for two more performances. I have never been so exhausted in my life. I wouldn't have given it up for anything. It was one of the best theater experiences I've ever had in my life. Absolutely some of the most fun I've ever had. The children were adorable because they actually believed we were toys and this was the toyshop. Their faces when they got to see Santa were brilliant. One of my favorite parts of the weekend was Saturday and Sunday at the six o'clock performances when I was so tired I started believing in the toy shop myself. Honestly I don't think I would give up this experience for anything.

Thanks to the cast and crew of Toys for this amazing experience! You guys are truly amazing people and I had so much fun getting to know all of you. An excellent weekend that I'm still recovering from even through finals.

Peace out!