The Quest for Ugly Fabric

Once upon a time, in a faraway land known as Burlington, there was a boy and a girl. The boy was enrolled in a costume class at the University of Vermont and the girl was taking six classes at Champlain College. One day, the boy went to pick the girl up from school so they could go together to pick up some ugly fabric for the boy's costuming lab where he had to create an ugly bodice. They set out on the magically air conditioned bus which was a great escape from the hellfire that filled the ninety degree air outside.

The duo was looking for the coveted Joann Fabrics in the land of South Burlington when they had an idea: why not ride the bus with the new route to Walmart? They're sure to have fabric there! Half and hour later, the boy and the girl skipped off the bus with delight and made a quick pitstop at Dunkin Donuts where the girl acquired the tasteful nectar of life known as iced coffee. The nectar was perfect refreshment to keep the team going as the searched for the craft department. But once they got there, there was no fabric to be seen. The boy and the girl were very upset but they longingly dragged themselves back to the bus stop, determined to find the fortress of Joann Fabrics.

Unfortunately, the boy and the girl got off the bus at the wrong time, and too soon for they found the path ahead to get back to their beloved Burlington to be long and tiring. Another two hours passed as they wandered the lonely road. They found the path to Narnia and helped a lost traveler along the way, but no Joann Fabrics. Just when they were about to give up, all hope was renewed.

"Look," the boy exclaimed. "There it is!"

The girl followed the boy's exclamations to Joann Fabrics. There they found some of the tackiest fabric ever. With garments in hand, they set off for the University Mall because they could not find the bus stop outside Price Chopper although there was supposed to be one. Maps lie. Their trek was long, though by the time they finished their doings at the mall, the magical bus was not scheduled to arrive for another half an hour. They sighed in agony, but they continued their harrowing journey back to UVM where the boy retrieved a package and then to Champlain where they met up with another girl to go to the Hang Ten ball at UVM. In the end, the boy and the girl basically walked from the town of Williston all the way to the land of Burlington, but they still made it in time for the ball. A fairytale ending, and they got henna tattoos!

Peace out!